Stress relievers at work, such as plan for the unexpected and yoga in the conference room, and
stress-relieving workouts, like biking and brisk walking, are good but not enough. We need to
build up a personal relaxation hierarchy to relax efficiently from different levels of stress, from
airline delay to the Second War World. We need to look into the underlying problems differently.
There was an article about stress management for a disabled lady who lived on second floor and had a hard time to get out. Although she could benefit from many relaxation exercises, her deep
problem remains – isolation, physical and psychological, which made her more vulnerable to
stress, proven by research. What she needs most is an easy access for her wheel chair, so
she could enjoy outdoor activities. Volunteering for charity can help her further.
Having a good insights of self and others can not only eliminate the stress created by our own,
but also save a lot of future stress. A high school principal in New York disciplined one student
who was then sent to prison. After he got out of jail, the student went back to school to revenge
the principal. The principal answered the student’s “hot button push,” unfortunately, lost his
control and put his career in jeopardy.
We should not be limited by those "conventional" ways. A huge family “mess” stressed out an
attorney. One big issue was that his sister sued them. His parents favored him over his sister,
and gave him nearly 90% of the inheritance. The sister filed one lawsuit after another to fight for
her share. No family fund had been set up, which could spare usually 20-45% of parents' assets
when they died, and make his sister drop all the lawsuits happily. The attorney was speechless.
To eliminate stress may be hard but possible. One physician suffered a traumatic brain injury
(sever head injury) that every expert predicted 100% and permanent disability. Cognitive ability
to an MD is like running ability to a Marathon athlete -- life or death. None of the stress relievers,
from deep breathing, to painting, to horseback riding, to massage ... could spare the stress
permanently, but gave her the time and mind to try everything that we could possibly find. At
the end, the doctor has fully recovered, and done excellent in her practice. She is also the first
person who has found a cure to the poor impulse control secondary to traumatic brain injury,
which has been claimed incurable by many institutions, including Harvard. For someone who
would rather die than be disabled, to recover fully is the only solution. Her will and personal
relaxation hierarchy helped to find her ways.
We can also “technically” eliminate the stress. A CEO suffered newly onset insomnia due to her business. Neither her personal relaxation methods nor sleeping pills could work -- it was the
feeling of insecure stressed her most. Sleep is very important to productivity, wellness and beauty.
However, she would not have the “real” sense of security until her business thrived. She chose
self-hypnosis over several ways and placed her faith as “the sense of security” directly into her
unconscious. From the day of the installation, she could sleep like a log at night. Her business
has grown bigger and bigger.
Stress can also be transformed. Here is my favorite case. A physician could not overcome
severe depression two years after he lost his wife. Dr. Viktor E. Frankl, the author of Man’s
Search for Meaning, asked the doctor what would have happened if he had died first, and his wife
had had to survive him. The doctor said that would be terrible to her to suffer. After Dr. Frankl told
the patient that it was his suffering that had spared his wife’s, the patient said nothing but shook
Dr. Frankl’s hand and left calmly. Nobody could revive the patient’s wife, but the meaning that
Dr. Frankl had found transformed the stress into something worth bearing. Bad things can happen
to good people. The stress can be a door opener if we can find its good meaning.
The above are sample cases used at The Prince Synergy. Stress can come from external worlds
as well as our own mind, health and our relations with external and internal world. We can utilize
stress, prevent stress, relax well from stress, and handle stress efficiently at different stages.
We don't have to let stress govern our life. We can reduce medical costs, turnover, absenteeism,
and keep top-performing employees, yet enjoy a better work/life balance, look and feel young.
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